The work of raising teenagers is complicated. Each chapter of adolescence reminds us that the journey of teenagers through high school is often messy, beautiful, and nonlinear. For those of us who choose to spend our careers in education, we know that in the long run, student engagement and individual growth are the ultimate measures of success. We never tire of watching students evolve from an uncertain, squirrely 14 year old to a slightly more mature, perhaps overly confident 16 year old to a self-aware, self-advocating 18 year old ready to take on the world.
This natural arc of adolescence is closely linked to a young person’s confidence in the classroom, on the athletic field, in the art studio, and simply in life. In THIS blog post shared earlier this summer, we referenced a quote by Russell Shaw in which he commented on the importance of helping students believe in themselves, “Confidence is contagious: When we’re good at things, our courage rises. When young people experience themselves as strong and capable—as an artist, an athlete, a leader, or a friend—they are better equipped to persevere through obstacles in other areas of their life.”
We believe Proctor’s gift to each family is that our educational model provides students the time, space, and skills necessary to figure out who they are, not who we want them to be, or who others want them to be. Fall Family Weekend provides an opportunity to pause our normal day to day life and invite families into the Proctor experience. We make time for conversations on the sidelines, on the pathways, during parent/teacher conferences, and at social events where we get to see our students share this new version of themselves with their parents, guardians, and siblings. The varied voices of impact in each student’s life join together to paint a picture of observed academic and social growth since the start of the year.
These conversations with advisors, teachers, coaches, and dorm parents provide a triangulation of feedback that helps frame the normal twists and turns of adolescence for our students. During each conversation, we demonstrate our belief that we must explicitly name our students’ strengths for them so that they may feel recognized and reinforced for their successes. When we talk about our observations, those little moments when we see them light up, or the seemingly insignificant act that may serve as the foundation for something powerful in the future, we help our young people understand that we see them, understand them, and want to walk alongside them as they figure things out.
While we never want to sugar coat feedback, we enter into every conversation through a lens of potential. Shaw, again in the piece linked above, writes, “In an era when young people are bombarded with messages about what they must achieve, we can remind them of what they already possess.” We are so grateful that our families share this belief in who our students are becoming. Trust develops over time as we partner with families and help each other see the arc of adolescence not as something to fear, but something to celebrate.
Thank you to all of our families for their partnership and for sharing a beautiful Fall Family Weekend with us on campus! We hope everyone enjoys a few days to rejuvenate before hitting the ground running again next week.
View More Photos from Fall Family Weekend 2025!
- Community and Relationships
- Events
- Parents