Far behind the façade of the quaint
little school known as Proctor Academy lies a social circle known simply as the
“Lax Bros”. Highly impenetrable, yet outwardly social, this group of young men
can be recognized by their lacrosse apparel, their fairly long hair (or “flow”
as they call it), and their tendency to be accompanied by others of their kind.
This unique group of individuals has a strong presence on campus, with a
mystique that has yet to be deciphered. I took it upon myself to infiltrate deep
within their ranks to discover what a Bro truly is. After months of bonding and
“chilling” with its members, I was able to secure interviews with some of the
most recognizable Lax Bros on campus: Fraser, Andrew and Max.
These are the conversations
When did you first realize or consider yourself a Bro? How
did it begin?
Max: It began around the age of five, the first time I
picked up a lacrosse stick.
Andrew: Probably when I started playing a lot of lax, and
when I spent most of my time at the beach.
Fraser: I think it started when I found myself standing
outside, with a pair of calf-highs (high socks) on, (Nike) Dunks, and a
lacrosse shirt; I realized, this is what I want, this is what I am.
In your opinion, what characteristics define a Bro?
Fraser: That is a broad question because there are different
types of Bros, you can have a Bro in any different sport or activity, and then you
can have just a loser Bro. I consider myself a Lax Bro. But you can have Tennis
Bros, Soccer Bros, Hockey Bros, there is a huge variety. Simply put, a Bro is
somebody who engulfs themselves in their passion, something they love.
Max: Long hair, not too much (in Brolingo that would be
called flowfection), high socks, about mid-calf, usually Nike, dry-fit, with a
lax stick usually carried around.
What does the daily routine of a Bro consist of?
Fraser: He wakes up late. He takes a shower (he always needs
nice, conditioned flow). He gets dressed, maybe watches some videos if he has
time. He macks on (flirts with) babes all day; pretty much every girl he sees, he
macks on. You gotta have that part. Always thinkin’ they’re the man. Maybe watching
more videos if they have time. Who knows, it’s whatever goes, really.
This is Andrew, in goal.
Max: After taking a shower, I usually put on my socks first,
making sure they are the right length, right height, and usually pick out my
shorts after that, usually go with the Nantucket Reds, which are a high
favorite of many Bros. I normally go to class, then to lax practice. I will stay
a little longer; practice my shot and my passing, lefty. After that, we (Bros) probably
have a barbecue, have some burgers on the grill. I chill with the other Bros,
maybe play a little Frisbee, a little whiffleball, if it is nice out, play some
volleyball, and then call it a day.
What is it like being a Bro?
Fraser: It’s fun, a lot of fun. I never get tired of it, it’s
always fun. I can’t complain.
Andrew: I am just being me; I am not trying to be like
anyone else. I just do what I gotta do.
To those looking to attain Bro status or looking for
possible indications of
TransBrotation, what symptoms might they experience?
Andrew: The symptoms depend on the type of Bro, but they
will probably make you want to play some sport, play some whiff (whiffleball), or
have a barbeque with a bunch of friends; just the urge to be laid back.
Max: Becoming a Bro usually starts with the parents at a
very young age, raised as a Bro, you don’t normally become a Bro in high school,
it tends to have to do with the parents, it is how you are born.
Fraser: Transforming into a Bro is a very long and
complicated process. It does not happen overnight. For example, Tim Meehan always explains
that becoming a Bro is never gonna happen to him no matter how hard he tries.
You just have to be born with it. It is something that just flows through my
veins. You can’t really become one, it’s tough.
Any additional comments?
Andrew: It’s my life.
Fraser: I just like Bro-ing out.
Fraser with Bro Will C:
After months of interaction and this
enlightening set of interviews, I have come to some solid conclusions about Bros:
a Bro is almost always genetic.
are multiple types of Bros.
are primarily athletes.
have their own language with terms such as: flow, overflow, flowfection, Brobeque,
whiff, Brolingo, and Bro-ing out, to name a few.
are all about being laid back.
Lastly, I hope this article has
been insightful in understanding this integral part of our community.